Sunday, May 6, 2012

Surreality

Unfortunately this week I lost a family member.  After battling with numerous health problems over the last few years my grandfather passed away in the early hours of this morning.  My mum, brother and uncle were beside him to the end and have seemed nothing but composed and optimistic the entire week.  In fact I can't even express how strong my mum has been handling this by herself in the beginning and continuing to keep everyone updated hour by hour.
I on the other hand have literally been a mess, I'm not going to lie I have tears streaming down my cheeks as I write this.  I think for the most part it just seems surreal that I'm never going to be able to see him again I mean I haven't been the worlds best granddaughter with the lack of effort I've put in over the past ten years.
I promise you I'm not going to relay you with any regret or guilt stories because I really don't have any its just odd, hard, sad  understanding a death when you're not around to see it happen or are away from family you can share sadness with.  I guess its pretty unfortunate that my other half is away until the end of the week but my girlfriends have been great this weekend and taken my mind off everything as much as they can one amazing lady in particular.

RIP Grandad.


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